Workaholism: 5 Things You Need to Know
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My weekly newsletter is focused on helping you thrive in leadership and life.
But sometimes leadership at work interferes with our lives. We intuitively know it, but ignore the impact.
And unfortunately, that comes at a great cost. Trust me, I know. My 18 years as a C-level exec created some questionable moments in my personal life.
I’m reading a great book a second time, From Strength to Strength, by Arthur Brooks. He provides powerful perspective on this topic, and I want to share it with you.
The next three minutes are about you—how to spot an unhealthy relationship with work and, most importantly, what to do about it.
5 Things You Need to Know About Workaholism
I.
It's Not Just About Working Long Hours
Loving your work and being committed to excellence is different from being a workaholic. True workaholism manifests when work dominates all other aspects of life, leaving no energy for loved ones. A person might enjoy their work, but if it consumes them to the point of isolation, there’s a problem.
💡Try this: Set a hard stop time each day to transition from work to personal time. But be sure you’re leaving energy on the table to connect with those close to you.
II.
The Sneaky Habits of a Workaholic
Workaholics often hide their work habits, sneaking in extra hours when no one is looking. This secretive behavior can cause tension in relationships, leading to feelings of neglect or resentment from loved ones. It’s like hiding an unhealthy habit, which only makes it more destructive.
💡Try this: Be open about your work schedule with your family and plan activities that take you away from the desk during your off-hours.
III.
More Hours Don’t Equal More Productivity
The belief that the 14th hour of work is critical to success is often a delusion. Research shows that productivity drops sharply after 8-10 hours of work per day, leading to diminished returns. Those extra hours are often filled with distractions rather than meaningful work.
💡Try this: Track your focus and productivity throughout the day and notice when it starts to wane. Use that as a signal to wrap up for the day.
IV.
Work Can’t Replace Human Connection
A job can never provide the fulfillment that comes from deep, personal relationships. Many workaholics sacrifice meaningful moments, such as anniversaries or family milestones, for the sake of career achievements. In the long run, this trade-off leaves a void that work alone can’t fill.
💡Try this: Identify one important event or moment you’ve missed for work recently. Make a commitment to prioritize similar future events over work.
V.
Workaholism Isn’t About Work—It’s About Validation
Workaholism stems from a craving for validation, not just a love of the job. Workaholics chase the dopamine rush from achievements and recognition, using success to mask the discomfort of everyday life. When the idea of a "normal" life feels unbearable, they prioritize accolades over genuine connections with loved ones.
💡Try this: Focus on internal validation by celebrating small personal wins that aren't tied to work. Practice gratitude for moments of connection with loved ones, no matter how small.
Not sure if you’ve crossed the line into workaholism? Ask yourself these three questions from Arthur Brooks' framework:
(1) Do you fail to reserve part of your energy for your loved ones after work and stop working only when you are a desiccated husk of a human being?
(2) Do you sneak around to work? For example, when your spouse leaves the house on a Sunday, do you immediately turn to work and then put it away before they return so it is not apparent what you were doing?
(3) Does it make you anxious and unhappy when someone—such as your spouse—suggests you take time away from work for activities with loved ones, even when nothing in your work is unusually pressing?
If you answer "yes" to any of these, it might be time to reevaluate your priorities.
As always, you can vent, share tools, ask questions, or make comments. Let’s get the conversation started below!
Your coach,
Chris
P.S. ♻ Sharing is caring. Please consider forwarding this to a colleague or friend, if you found it useful. Your kindness could improve someone else’s world of work!
