Are you being ignored?
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Hello Friend!
I recently helped a tech company’s executive team align on their annual plan. The group was dynamic, with tons of messy conflict.
They also had this weird propensity to ignore Emma.
She was their COO.
On many occasions during their offsite, her seemingly interesting and provocative ideas didn’t land.
One example: the team was debating how to make customer success more predictable during onboarding.
While others tossed out shallow ideas, Emma laid out strong evidence that one actionable strategy could have far-reaching implications.
As she stated her case, I watched the team return blank stares. No one said a thing. There was a long pause when she finished. It was probably only 15 seconds, but it felt like minutes.
The CTO broke the silence. But instead of building on Emma’s idea, or even acknowledging it, he just tossed out a different (and weakly constructed) idea.
I wondered if this was like The Sixth Sense, the movie where Bruce Willis’ character is dead but doesn’t know it. And perhaps like the little boy with the supernatural power to “see dead people,” I was the only one in the room who sensed Emma’s presence.
The team parked the issue.
On day two, the topic re-emerged. Emma sat quietly, and I could read the frustration on her face. Then the head of sales presented a “new idea” he’d “thought about the night before.”
But his idea wasn’t new at all. It was the exact one Emma had shared the day before.
He acted as if the clouds parted, the angels sang, and he was blessed with new wisdom. And to my amazement, the group acted like that, too!
(Except for Emma, who of course looked completely deflated.)
Here’s the uncomfortable part. Emma is brilliant. Experienced. Right more often than not.
And she was completely ignorable.
Being ignored rarely announces itself. There’s no memo. No meeting where someone says, “We’ve decided to stop taking you seriously.” It shows up quietly in the room you weren’t invited to, in the idea that only landed once someone else said it.
Which means you can be missing opportunities right now and not even know it.
So let’s name it. Because until you name a problem, you can’t fix it.
Think back over the last three months. Have any of these happened to you?
1. You’re the last to know. The big decisions, like the ones that set direction or commit real resources, get made without your input. You find out through an admin, an email, or hallway gossip.
2. Your ideas don’t land until someone else says them. You pitch it. Silence. Then a “more listenable” colleague repackages it weeks later, and suddenly it’s brilliant. (See: Emma.)
3. You’re not invited to meetings you should be in. High-stakes conversations happen squarely in your domain, and you’re not on the invite list.
4. You’re passed over for stretch assignments. Your performance gets praised. Your potential gets ignored. The interim role, the board initiative, the big transformation — your name never comes up.
5. Everyone nods, but nothing happens. You present a strong vision. Enthusiastic head nods. Then… crickets. Compliments, but no capital. Input, but never action.
If even one of these felt a little too familiar, you’re not imagining it. And you’re not alone.
In fact, Gallup reports that only 1 in 4 global workers feel strongly that their opinions matter at work.
But here’s what matters most: this isn’t a life sentence.
There are five evidence-based behaviors that change how people experience you. They’re the difference between being the smartest person no one listens to… and being the person everyone turns to. I broke all five down in a separate edition right here.
And if you want to actually master them with real feedback, alongside people navigating the exact same thing… that’s why I built Becoming Unignorable.
It’s a cohort designed to help you get heard, trusted, and followed at work. Not by being louder, playing politics, or self-promoting. But with real tools that you can immediately apply that honor who you really are and don’t force you to be someone you’re not.
We kick off September 9th. And it’s a remarkably low-cost investment for what it changes: being taken seriously has a funny way of turning into bigger opportunities.
Grab your seat here.
Emma didn’t have an idea problem. She had a being-heard problem.
Most talented people do.
The good news? That’s the fixable kind.
Your coach,
Chris
P.S. Two things worth knowing. There’s an early bird discount through August 30th. After that, the price goes up. And the room caps at 50 people, so it won’t stay open indefinitely. Want to talk it through before you commit? Schedule a clarity call and let’s see if it's the right fit.
“This course is life-changing. It opened my eyes to new skills that I’ve never experienced before, and I’m 30+ years into my career.” —Suzy Sandifer, Director of Enterprise Apps